Changing a Belief

As I was reading Mind over Medicine this week, and it was illustrating how our thoughts and emotions correlate to chemical/electrical processes which then correlate to disease, I was asking myself, what can I do with this information? Ideas about that came in Chapter 7, Happiness is Preventative Medicine (page 138). I was trying to find the link between this data, Ernest Holmes, and his teachers, and other things I have learned over the years.

On page 138, Lisa Rankin is talking about the findings of Dr. Martin Seligman in a book Learned Optimism. Seligman, after a quick internet search, is an America Psychologist and Educator at the University of Pennsylvania. Rankin writes that Seligman recommends two ways to deal with knee-jerk pessimistic beliefs: Thinking about something else, and disputing them. The process of disputing them reminds me of the argumentative method (Holmes, and Quimby). It is by changing our beliefs that we dismantle them. For me, this is the same meaning behind John 8:32 “The truth shall set you free.” While some limit the context of that statement to trust in God, I always intuited that it had a more general meaning. When I read Holmes regarding correcting faulty belief (about anything), determining whether the belief is accurate (true) is the key to holding onto it or letting it go. It’s like a IF/THEN statement in computer science. IF something IS true, then do this thing. IF it ISN’T true, do some other thing.

Seligman’s other technique is more physiological. It’s using a shock, or a diverting sensation, to the nervous system to interrupt the thought (neurological process). This technique reminds of me of the work of Travell and Simmons, the theory behind NeuroMuscular Therapy (NMT). When I was a Licensed Massage Therapist and got certified in NMT, I learned that trigger point therapy is mostly about interrupting an electrical signal. Our muscles only know how to do one thing (tighten). Presence of an electrical signal to the muscle tells it to tighten. Our muscles can become habitually tightened. So much so that we don’t consciously realize we are tightening them. There is a tightening feedback loop. Trigger Point therapy, pressing on a trigger point, interrupts the circuit and allows the muscle to relax. This all relates back to the nervous system, which is itself influenced by our thoughts. My guess is that is why there are stories of Zen masters smacking their students on the head. To physiologically break the neurologic circuit in their thinking. 

I find it fascinating how the findings of one researcher can support the findings of another in a different discipline. They all point to the “truth”, i.e. how the Universe works. And that can help us work with it to affect change. I realize that the preferred method for a licensed Practitioner is affirmation (changing the thought) and argument (disproving the faulty thought). Smacking my client on the head may be frowned upon; however effective that may be. 

My personal process

Recognition

My background is in the corporate training of technology. For my entire career, I worked with computers to get them to do what I needed to do. Once I figured it out, I taught others how to do it. Everything in a computer works by using algorithms, which is just a techie term for a series of steps to do something. You want to create a Word document? There is a series of steps for that. It’s a process. Doctors have protocols. Computer networks have protocols too. One of my skills is web design. HTTP, the thing you see on every computer web address is the designation of the Hypertext Transfer Protocol. It routes the request for a web page to the right port and ultimately the right software to process the request. It contains the IP address of the requesting computer so the server knows where to send the file. It’s like an automated form of the telephone systems that route your call. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for Customer Service, etc.

Computer software has algorithms. If this happens, do this thing (IF THEN statement). When this happens, do this (WHEN statement). Do this (Do loop) when this condition is met. It’s all the same thing. Monitor the environment. When something happens, notice it, and then decide what to do about it. The tornado warning sounds? Head to the basement.

I have learned to monitor my feelings. There is a thing that computer CPUs (Central Processing Units) do. They constantly poll their inputs. CPUs have input points and output points. They periodically monitor their ports to see if there is data waiting there to be processed. I’m not a computer scientist, so I don’t know if certain ports get preferential treatment over others. I would imagine that is true. All systems have certain things that are more critical than others. This is true in biology. I suspect it is true in computer science. The sound of a human screaming in distress will get our attention fast.

Just as a CPU polls its ports, I periodically check in with how I’m feeling. Am I happy, sad, nervous, angry, fearful, neutral? I try not to judge whatever I discover in my personal internal scan. I just notice it. It’s input. At the point of noticing it, I have a choice, i.e. my algorithm kicks in. Should keep feeling it? Do I want to change my experience? Am I judging it? So many options.

All options are perfectly fine. All have their experience. Sometimes, it feels important to me to be with the emotion, to simply let it run its course and dissipate on its own. Sometimes, it feels important to me to shift it. If I’m feeling angry at an interaction I had with my wife, It might be helpful for me to understand why I’m angry so I can determine if I need to talk to her about it after I cool down. I don’t want to escalate it. I don’t want to do any harm. But if I don’t site with it and see what’s under it, I won’t know what is causing my response.

Sometimes I don’t like the thoughts I’m having about whatever I’m thinking about. We all have our own habitual algorithms. We learned them from our parents, or from friends or siblings. School, church, books are all sources. The list of inputs goes on. My wife may say something that triggers an old algorithm in me. Something from childhood. My wife doesn’t even realize what happened. Neither do I. All I know is that I’m having an emotional experience.

What to do about it

If I suddenly find myself in a state of consciousness that is uncomfortable, and I’m feeling a desire to shift it, I have to look at why I want to shift it. If I’m judging my feeling or want to run away from it, I have found it is better to simply give myself permission to sit with it for a while. Understanding is a powerful tool. Sitting with a feeling allows the reason for it to bubble up. Underneath it is a thought, a belief that I have about something. If I take the time to sit with that feeling, I might discover why it is there.

Everything happens for a reason. My response is there for a reason. It may be maladaptive. It may be something that helped me earlier in my life, and now has just become a habit that creates an issue. If I determine, non-judgementally, that I’m holding on to something that doesn’t serve me any longer, then I can let it go, with thanks. That “thanks” is important. I was at war with myself for years. It took me a while to let go of the constant self-judgement. That self-judgement was a huge chunk of emotional energy pointed at something I was thinking or feeling. And it kept that belief alive inside of me. It wasn’t until I learned to sit with it, in love, in curiosity, that I could disengage the emotional tether that was keeping me tied to it. My releasing of that tether took time. Little by little, chunk by chunk, I patiently worked through the emotional tie, until, one day, my being able to release it came down to a simple choice. The judgement was gone. The belief no longer held the same power. I was no longer at war with it. Now, I could lovingly see where it came from, and just release my grip and let it float away like a balloon on a breeze.

During the process of sitting with it is where the “argumentative method” comes in. As thoughts and beliefs bubble up, there is an opportunity to investigate them. It’s just information. It’s just a view or perspective of the world. Does it make sense? Is it true? Where it came from can help, but it’s not necessary. I did not have to know the source of where I learned it to look at it. Knowing the source sometimes sent down the alley of blaming others. It helped me to understand the context. It did not help me to let it go. What helped me to let it go was the realization that I was not my thoughts. I was not my feelings. I was not my body. Identifying with something ties me to it energetically. Realizing my essence is more than my experience helped me to disengage. If I am my thought, then fighting with a thought is fighting myself. If a thought is simply an idea passing through me, then I have the freedom to scrutinize it and make some choices about it. Having the choice is a very powerful position to be in.

Once the argumentative method has shown me the mechanics of what I’m dealing with, once I have wrestled with an old belef and come to the realization of what is true about what I’m believing, now I have the freedom to gently shift my thinking in any number of ways. At this point, affirmations can come in really handy. They are an alternate energy to engage that will shift my experience. If I’m stuck in an inner conflict, I don’t find affirmations very helpful. I have to move through the conflict. Once the conflict is resolved, the affirmation can be very useful.

References

  1. Rankin, Lisa (2013). Mind over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself. Hay House Publ. ISBN 978-1-4019-3998-4
  2. Holmes, Ernest (1938). the Science of Mind: A Philosophy, A Faith, A Way of Life (The Definitive Edition). Tarcher Perigee Publ. ISBN: 978-0-87477-921-9
  3. Hughes, Ronald (2009). Phineas Parkhurst Quimby: His Complete Writings and Beyond. Phineas Parkhurst Quimby Resource Center Publ. ISBN: 978-0-578-04092-9
  4. Seligmann, Martin (2006). Learned Optimism: How to Change your Mind and Your Life. Vintage Publ. ISBN: 978-1400078394.
  5. Simmons, David G. and Travell, Janet G. (1999, 2nd Ed.) Myofacial Pain and Dysfunction: The Trigger Point Manual. Williams and Wilkins Publ. ISBN: 978-0683083637.